My world

"Rejoice always!" (1 Thessalonians 5:16, HCSB)

Welcome to my world. If you walked into my house today you'd see an empty box sitting by the front door. We got a package a few days ago, and my daughter has been playing with it ever since. There'd be dishes in the sink, the washing machine would probably be running, and I'm sure there'd be dust on most surfaces. I would happily invite you into my slightly messy house and offer you a cup of coffee or a freshly brewed cup of tea from my red teapot. My daughter would want to show you her room, messy with books, clothes and baby dolls. She'd probably ask you to read a book or play Leggos with her for a bit. We'd settle down and have a talk, in the midst of chaos, because this is my beautiful, crazy life. Welcome in.

I would tell you that I've been a little overwhelmed lately, a little stressed. The kiddos are leaving me oh so tired by the end of each day. I would tell you that it often takes me days to get the simplest of chores down. How I'm trying to re-prioritize, re-organize my life once again. Babies have constantly changing schedules, I have to constantly adapt and change the way we live our lives, while keeping a sense of order.

I would tell you how thankful I am for you, as my friend.

God is slowly teaching me that friendships come from all types of places. Distance plays no factor. Appearance or age has little to do with it. In our world wandering, we find the people God had planned for us. I often call these people my "coffee shop" friends. We may be so different, but our souls meet over a cup of coffee. Different backgrounds collide as we share our faith in Jesus with one another. Encouragement and love can be found in such moments. A meeting of the spirits, kindred spirits.

So can I remind you that you're valued today?  You, wife who has watched her husband fight a war overseas. You, mother who rocks her baby late at night. You, friend who initiates relationships after each new move. You, reader, who comes to this blog and reads my words. Whatever place you're in, you're valued, you're loved.

I used to have trouble opening up. Broken relationships and a hurt heart caused me to button up, to not easily let friends in. I'm sure this caused me to miss out on some great relationships. My fear of rejection, my fear of hurt, has kept me back from many things.
But slowly, God has done a work on me. My heart is still incredibly tender, but I'm starting to open up. Starting to let the world, to let all of you in.
Because even an introvert knows that we're not supposed to live this life on our own. We need companionship. We desire company (even in small doses).
So, today I'm thankful for you, in this blogging world, and how you stumbled across my blog. Can we be friends? Can I feel free to share my heart with you? Because this blog is nothing but honest. I hope, in my realistic retelling of life's ups and downs, that you can be encouraged. Encouraged in the fact that you're not alone. We're all in this race together, figuring out how to be a wife, a mother, a friend.

God is teaching me some lessons during these military years. Lessons on dependence, faith, patience, and friendship. He's teaching me how to love a little more freely, how to seek out people to minister to.

And now, I've rambled for far too long, without really talking about the verse up above. My goal for today was to encourage you. To let you know where I'm coming from. Because I love sharing. I love writing. It is my passion. Sometimes I, honestly, get annoyed that I can't do it more. Life, it's responsibilities, it's distractions, gets in the way.
And so, I'm trying to re-prioritize so that I can meet with you a little more. Sip coffee with you more often. Share my heart with you, so that you know you aren't alone on this road. Encourage you to stand firm.

How can I pray for you today, friend?

A tough day

"Rejoice always! Pray constantly. Give thanks in everything, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus" (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, HCSB).

Yesterday was, honestly, not the best day on record. Little girl was grumpy all morning, had a tantrum in public, and then started getting sick after nap time. As the mommy, it was up to me to clean up the mess. On a normal day, I don't handle sick tummies very well. Add in a pregnancy, and I do even worse. It wasn't fun, my friends. Definitely not something I want to repeat.

After tucking little one in bed, I decided to watch a movie that had been on our instant que for quite awhile. It was in tears by the end of it. This movie truly reminded me to be thankful for every day with my little one. Even the days when she tests me in more way than one. Little girl truly is a gift from God. Who am I to say how many days that will be for? My heart prayer is that it will be for decades upon decades. That I will watch my little girl grow up into a beautiful, independent adult. But not everyone has this privilege. The Heart of Christmas tells the story of a little boy, only slightly older than Little E is right now, who eventually dies from leukemia. Seriously a hard watch for this pregnant mama. But I think it was the reminder my heart needed.

I get so frustrated with Little E sometimes. Everything feels harder with a little one in tow. It takes twice as long to even get out of the house in the morning. I never seem to have the time I want to devote to my writing, or to even enjoy most of the hobbies I have.

My life has been radically changed by the addition of a little one. And now I'm expecting one more. I'm sure these next few years will prove themselves even more challenging.

It's so important to remain thankful. To recognize everything I do have. Because these things have only been given to me by God. Someone told me once that I was uniquely created to be little E's parent. I am the mother intended for here. God placed her in my arms on her birth-day for a reason. We (the hubby & I ) are uniquely equipped to handle her, even on the toughest days when she's not at her best (saying it mildly!).

And so, I give thanks. Thanks for the bad day we had yesterday. Thanks for a little sick girl who cuddled with me on the couch last night. Thanks for her loud scream, that helps me keep track of her in busy stores (ha!). Thanks for her vibrancy, her stubbornness, that will hopefully be used for good someday. Thanks for her independence, her ability to know what she likes and doesn't like. Thanks for her intelligence, that sometimes translates into crying, because she has trouble expressing what she knows she wants. Thanks for a little body that heals for sickness. Thanks that she slept a healing sleep last night. Thanks that, in a few minutes, my girl will be waking up to greet the day. Thanks that I get the privilege to spend this day with her. Thanks for the hard times, the times that push me to grow and learn as a parent. Thanks for the moments of sunshine, when my girl chats with me, dances through life, and showers me with kisses. Thanks.

Really, I have so much to be thankful for.

I'm linking up today with Chatting at the Sky's Tuesdays Unwrapped. Hop on over to read all of the posts :)

The Little Things

It wasn’t long after my husband left that I began to miss the little things. Tripping over his boots in the morning, extra dishes and laundry, an extra person generally making the house more dirty and life more interesting.

I missed being annoyed about this things. I missed how ordinary life feels when it’s full and messy.

And then, he came home, and started making a general, cluttered mess once again. My brain started to get annoyed, but then my heart started to kick in.

 Shouldn’t life be slightly messy? Does it really matter if there’s a mound of dirty laundry in the bathroom, various uniform accoutrements on the stairs, and a random hat full of coins by the phone charger?

My perfectionist nature says that these things are out of place, that those around me are inconsiderate if they don’t live up to my standards.

But that’s not necessarily true.

 My loved ones surely do try, or our house would be much worse off.

As it is, our life is slightly cluttered.

 It’s living.

It’s breathing.

It’s laughter.

It’s time spent in sunshine rather than over a mop and broom.

And that’s a pretty great life.

As for the little annoying things, I’ll brush them off and keep working hard at being thankful today and everyday.

 What little things get on your nerves day-in and day-out? How could you turn those things into reasons to be thankful?   

“Give thanks in everything, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18, HCSB).

A Labor of Love

“We recall, in the presence of our God and Father, your work of faith, labor of love, and endurance of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ, knowing your election, brothers loved by God” (1 Thessalonians 1:3-4, HCSB).

This military life is truly a labor of love.

The moment my husband held our little girl, he truly became a daddy. In that moment she grabbed a hold of a piece of his heart and he’s never been the same since. (Sorry if that sounds overall sappy. It’s the truth). I watched an amazing, tender side of my husband come to the forefront on that day. He held our daughter so gently, changed her diapers, soothed her cries, and clumsily figured out how to swaddle her tightly in the hospital blanket. He was nervous, but so good at what he was doing!

Since then he’s tucked her into bed each night that he’s home, given her bottles, played with her, and made her laugh like none else can. She’s her daddy’s girl.

While he’s away it’s my responsibility to keep her safe. It’s my responsibility to lover and nurture this little one, so that she’s happy and healthy when her daddy returns. It’s a great responsibility. One I could never face without my Savior by my side. But I do it out of love. I do it because I love my daughter, and because I love my husband. He trusts me with this task, so it’s one I don’t take lightly. It’s my labor of love on this earth. There are no better words to describe it. It’s so tough sometimes, especially at 3AM, but I do it out of love. I do it out of my sense of responsibility. I do it because my husband trusts me to care for our daughter, manage our finances, and keep our house in shape while he’s gone. It’s nice to be needed. And it’s nice to labor out of love.

What are your labors of love in this world?

“Faith, Love and Endurance”

"We recall, in the presence of our God and Father, your work of faith, labor of love, and endurance of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ, knowing your election, brothers loved by God” (1 Thessalonians 1:3-4, HCSB).

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why.

Why I persevere.

Why I continue to look after the needs of my daughter and husband.

Why God would chose this life for us.

Why God has called my husband into the military. Into a life that would take him away from his family for long stretched of time.

Why we can’t live close to our extended family.

Why.

There’s so many whys. I could spend my life comparing my life to that of others. Or I could truly embrace the life God has given me.

I can mope around while my husband is away, or I can focus on all the ways we are truly blessed.

We have a beautiful house to live in. No, it doesn’t belong to us, it belongs to the Air Force, but it’s beautiful just the same.

We have a good church, one in which the Pastor preaches scriptural truths week after week.

We have a great family, one we look forward to seeing over the holidays each year.

We have a beautiful daughter who fills our house with laughter and mischievous acts.

We have each other. Oh how blessed I am to have a husband who prays with me every day! That’s definitely something I should never over look.

No, I can’t answer the whys of this life. I wish I could. But instead of trying to answer them, I can live each day embracing the blessings that surround me.

I can endure these hard times because I have hope in a greater power. I can get through these lonely days because I know someone who takes my heart and holds it each step of the day, my Savior Jesus Christ.

This life is a life of faith. It’s a life with things we often can’t understand. As a military wife, I’m starting to understand this more and more. It’s a life filled with hard work. The nights can be so long with a baby in the house and a husband far away. And it’s a life of endurance, knowing that better days are surely ahead. We have to trust in that, we have to hope in that, so that we can get through the tough days.

Even in the midst of a hard season, where can you see God at work in your life? What blessings can you find? Sometimes it seems almost impossible to find them, but they’re there, just the same.

Jesus at the Helm

I’ve finished Colossians in my devotions. Still, I find myself coming back to Colossians 3:15 over and over again. There’s just something about that verse that speaks to my heart right now. There’s something about allowing God’s peace to control my heart. It’s a lesson I’ve really needed hammered home as of late.

This week has been a lonely one. It’s been a week where my daughter and I have pretty much been on our own. It’s had days where I’ve desperately needed to speak to another grown-up. Do you ever have days like that?

It’s been a week that has really caused me to think about where my heart abides.

Does it abide in circumstances?

Do I spend more of my day worry about the things happening around me then I do on my knees?

1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to “pray constantly.” Do I do this?

I hope that I do.

I need to pray constantly.

Why, you may ask?

Because, my dear friends, I need the strength of God so much. I need Him to help me through the hard days. To encourage me on the discouraging ones. To give me the strength to be the mommy I need to be to my little girl, the wife I need to be for my husband, and the friend I need to be to those around me.

I try time and again to do it on my own. But I can’t. I can’t meet the demands of this life without my Jesus at the Helm of it all. I have only made it this far in this thing called life because of His strength and peace.

Grab hold of him dear friends. Let him take your heart and fill it with His peace. Let Him take control. Trust me, there’s no better place to be.

Joy In Circumstances?

My joy does not depend on circumstances but on my Savior, Jesus Christ.
Yesterday I sat down in church, emotionally worn and thoroughly distracted by the little baby sleeping beside my chair. I was ready to listen, and boy was there something for me to hear! As soon as our pastor mentioned that his sermon was on joy, I knew that the message was meant for me. I hadn’t been that joyful over the weekend. In fact, I’d been near tears more than once. I was totally consumed with myself, my imperfections, and on everything in general that wasn’t right in my little world. My eyes were turned toward myself, instead of directed up toward my Savior.

“So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:18 NIV).

We all have happy and unhappy times in this life. I often let me emotions rule during these times, and allow them to affect how I ultimately act on a certain day. I’m sure this is a normal way to react. If a cell-phone company messes up my bill, my pants don’t fit, or my daughter is unusually grumpy, I then tend to be in a bad mood for the rest of that day. This bad mood spills out onto the rest of my family and friends as well. That’s a problem to be sure.

But here’s what my pastor reminded me of yesterday: happiness is different then joy. I can be joyful even on days when I’m not exactly happy. Happiness comes from my emotions; joy comes from my Savior, Jesus Christ.

Joy is a gift given to us as Christians. It’s a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22).
I’ve experienced unexplainable joy during some of the darkest parts of my life. Joy from my Savior is part of what’s carried me through those toughest times, in fact.

And so, today, even though I might not be feeling all that happy, I claim that wonderful gift of joy once again. For I need it in my life today and everyday.

Does your joy depend on your circumstances or your Savior?

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-17 NIV).