"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind" (James 1:5-6, NIV).
While my husband was gone, fear centered around his protection. It centered around the war zone he was fight in, and also on our safety back here at home. It sometimes included a lonely, dark house, that I would have to enter after a long day, without anyone's protection at hand.
Now, my fears are about the future.
I look at this coming year with so many fears. Fears about our next move. Fears about future children. It may sound silly, but I obsess about these things. They plague my thoughts. I was cleaning our bathrooms this morning, when my brain started worrying about if I'd be able to get this house clean enough for house inspections. Seriously? We don't even know when we're moving yet. I think worrying about things like that is a little far fetched. Just the same, the notion entered my head.
Satan seems to find leap holes in my reasoning and latch on. He knows that worrying is a weakness of mine, so he finds something and continually prods, until I'm obsessing about it constantly.
The future is a scarey thing. I'd like nothing more than to stay in the present and never have to plan ahead.
But time moves on, and my Savior asks me if I truly trust Him.
Do I trust Him to provide?
Do I trust Him with future children?
Do I trust Him with future moves, future deployments, with this military life as a whole?
Do I trust in His purpose and plan, because He can see my life in a grand sweep of time, He knows all that has and all that will happen. Do I truly trust Him to be in control of it all?
If I truly do, then why do I worry?
There's really no reason too.
He is more than able to handle it all.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 5:25-34, NIV).