"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast" (Psalm 139:9-10, NIV).
As the end of our trip approaches, I can't help but be thankful for the blessings of family. Yes, it's strange living under the same roof with all of them again. On my own, I have my own system. My own way of keeping my house up and running. When I'm back in my mother's house, I feel like a bit of an outsider. I feel like I'm in a world I don't exactly belong in anymore. Just the same, it's great laughing and talking with some of the people that know me best in this world. It's great watching my small daughter form a relationship with her grandparents and uncle, one that will only become more beautiful with time. And it's great having people to chat with in the evenings.
A part of me is nervous about returning home next week. Nervous about what it will be like when little girl and i are on our own. These last few weeks have not been easy. Little girl has been a horribly restless sleeper. Sometimes she'll wake up and cry for hours on end. It's been nice having people around to help me on those long nights. The lies in my head tell me that it will only be worse when we're back home.
But then I'm reminded of how far I've come. How little girl and I did handle things before. How we're returning, not only to our house, but to friends and a church family that love and care for us. But most of all, I'm reminded that God will not stay on this side of the country, when I board that plane home. No, He'll follow me back across the long miles, and continue to be my comfortor and provider.
My verse for this deployment (Phillippians 4:8) tells me to focus on the truths of God, not the lies of this world. Our mind can be such a battle field, but our God is so much bigger!
Do you have a special verse in your life right now? If so, what is it? How is it helping you?