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I’m Sorry


Words are so sharp. They cut so deep. I can often make excuses for what I'm saying:

I’m stressed right now.

He’s deploying soon.

He deserved hearing that.

And thankfully, I’m married to a man who gives me much more grace than I deserve.

He understands when I’m stressed.

He often allows  the words fly right off of him, without letting them sink in.

But I'm  still in the wrong.

I still say things to Him that He doesn't deserve.

I still use my words to hurt.

And so, I admit my shortcomings. I say the hard words, I’m sorry, even when I don’t want to.

I make the first move toward reconciliation.

Because I don’t want any walls to be built.

I don’t want cutting words to create separation between us.

I listen for the conviction of the Holy Spirit and obey.

Yes, it’s painful for a perfectionist to admit she’s in the wrong.

But yes, it has gotten easier with time.

And, yes, I truly believe I’m the better for it.

Do you ever feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit at work in your life? Is it easy or hard to listen to this conviction?

“Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among the parts of our [bodies]; it pollutes the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is set on fire by hell. For every creature—animal or bird, reptile or fish—is tamed and has been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men who are made in God's likeness” (James 3: 5b-9 HCSB).