Is it in the moment, or is it distracted and far off?
I’ve watched how different families deal with deployments and separations. For some, the family stops living while their deployed family member is far away. They hold their breath, withdraw from church and school activities, and whither up until their loved one returns home.
For others, it’s the opposite. They feel the big empty hole in their daily lives, but just the same, they keep on moving and keep on growing. They stay involved and live everyday to the utmost. This, too me, is the response I’d like to have when facing separation, but in my human skin it doesn’t always happen.
Sometimes I withdraw when I’m faced with hard situations. Sometimes I mope around and feel sorry for my state of loneliness. Sometimes I get less involved in the world around me and focus more on myself. Please don’t think I’m attacking any one here, because I’m not. I’m truly looking about my own heart when it comes to hardships I face in this life. I’m looking at how I respond to tough situations, be it a deployment, the loss of a job, separation from family and friends, or failing at something I’ve worked hard on.
Whatever the crisis may be, I often withdraw into myself. I look within and don’t let those around me help. I draw away from friends, family, and even my God. I’m preoccupied, introverted and uninvolved.
Have you ever felt similarly? Have you ever responded similarly? If you have, in essence, your heart has been deployed.
One of my reasons for naming the blog “Devotions of the Deployed Heart” is that I believe our hearts truly can be deployed in more than one way. Sometimes this is literally when our spouse, the love of our life, deploys overseas, leaving us behind, at other times a deployed heart is more subtle. It comes on slowly affecting our relationships with each other and with our God. This is the type of separation I’m talking about today.
It’s a separation that none of us really want. We want to be involved. We want to be on fire for our Lord. And so how does it happen? Sometimes it’s something big that brings it about, other times it’s subtle, a slow creeping on, a slow change, until one day we realize that our relationship with God isn’t what it once was. Our heart isn’t in it when we sing in church, we get distracted during the sermon, we avoid friends and family. Not a pretty picture, but I’ve been there just the same.
Today I want to make sure my heart truly is right with God. I want to be on fire for him and life my every breath to the utmost. What about you? Where is your heart today? Is it deployed, or is it in the moment?
“Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name” (Psalm 86:11 NIV).