Right now I want to cram every last memory into these final weeks before the deployment. There seems to be a part of me thinks that I’ll stop living while my husband is gone. There will certainly be fewer memories, fewer things to take pictures of. But will life really be on a giant pause while he’s away? Will I seriously sit around and do nothing while he’s gone?
Or will I continue to love every moment of this life God has given me?
Will I sit and home and count the hours until his return, or will I remain involved in my church, my community, my friends, my social groups?
Will I stop exploring and achieving? Or will I continue to search out new things, new ideas?
Will my relationship with God be on hold? Or will I continue to be a willing vessel?
Will my relationship with my husband be on hold? Or will we continue to communicate, growing and changing through this deployment?
I’m finding that I have a choice to make about this next year. I will either chose to survive or thrive.
Consider the definitions of these two words:
Survive: to endure or live through (an affliction, adversity, misery, etc.)
Thrive: to grow or develop vigorously; flourish
Which do you chose? Do you want to survive or thrive in the life God has given you?
The answer, for me, is easy. I want to thrive. I don’t want to just “endure” these coming months, I want to grow and develop and learn and change. I want to come out of the end of this deployment more in love with my God and my husband than ever.
Lord, please help me to thrive and grow in every situation. Help me to live out the words of Ephesians 4:15 which say, “Speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ”(NIV). Help me to grow during this time of deployment and to believe that you are working for the good in this and every situation. As Jeremiah 29:11-12 says, “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you’”(NIV). Help me to believe the truthfulness of these words, that you do have great things in store of me, even during this time of deployment. Help me to thrive in this and every situation in life.
Archive for » August, 2009 «
I knew this day would come when I said “I do” ten short months ago. Just the same, I’m dreading this first deployment. I’m wondering what I’ll do while he’s away. My whole life revolves around my husband. I take care of the house, run errands, and cook him his dinner each night. I look forward to the weekends when we can hike, and camp, and explore local touristy sights.
Since I heard about this deployment I’ve noticed something about myself. I depend on my husband a little too much. While it’s right that I should love him and honor him, the Lord always needs to be number one.
The Lord is telling me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NLT).
In other words, the Lord has been reminding me that he is enough. He works to the good of every circumstance. He feels the pain of the impending seperation and is not about to leave us or forsake us. He will be with us during our time apart. He will be our sustainer, if we allow him to.
He wants us to find joy in each and every situation. And, so, even though some of the fear is still there, I embrace his joy. I cling like never before to the words of Habakkuk 3:18-19. Times may be tough. I’m sure I will be tremendously lonely, “yet I will rejoice in the Lord! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation! The Sovereign Lord is my strength! He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights.” (NLT).
My first year of married life was a topsy-turvy one. I lost my job right before our wedding, which was a tough slam on my self-esteem. Because of that, I decided to try my lot at being a homemaker and freelance writer. I had mixed feelings about my new calling. I loved having the ability to write whenever and wherever I wanted, but the solitary days were tough. Moving across the country with the military even tougher.
I was lonely, depressed, and feeling as if I wasn’t “doing” enough with my life. I felt as if I was settling for less by staying at home.
I was wrong.
It took the news of this impending deployment to shake me out of my rut. It was then that I really, truly reached out to God and asked Him to help. It was then that I realized that a career, a husband, or the thought of future children could only bring a limited amount of happiness. Only God could give me the joy I truly needed.
I find it amazing that, even with the impending deployment, I have more joy and peace than I’ve had in the past year. I finally see some of my purpose, in encouraging all of you. I look forward to the times when I can sit down in a coffee shop and tap away on my laptop, writing about God and how he is my refuge and strength. Because it’s so entirely true. He sustains me each and every day.
With my husband leaving soon I should be a clingy basket case, but I’m not. I should be worrying about all the empty months before me, but I’m not. I should be staying up every night, thinking about the deployment, but I’m not. Yes, I still have my moments, but like never before, I have peace. The joy he’s given me, even now, is indescribable. I pray that each of you can experience this joy.
I’ve found that I can’t depend on other humans to make me happy in this life. Yes, I am happy in this life I’m building with my new husband. He does make me happy in the way he cares for me. But my true, sustaining happiness comes from God up above. He is the one who will sustain my joy so that I can be the encourager my husband needs me to be. He is the one who will see me through this season of deployment. He truly is my joy, my strength, and my everlasting song.
Today I find myself sporadically singing as I go about my day. It’s been awhile since I’ve done that. And it feels so good.
If you’re in need of some joy from our Father today, take hold of one of the verses below. Make it your own. Say it continuously. And claim the promise our Joy-Giver offers us.
• “He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy” (Job 8:21).
• “But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you” (Psalm 5:11).
• “You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand” (Psalm 16:11).
• “The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song” (Psalm 28:7).
• “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever” (Psalm 30:11-12).
• “Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me” (Psalm 51:12).
• “When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul” (Psalm 94:19).
• “You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands” (Isaiah 55:12).
Luke 12:7 Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
Right now I’m sitting on my porch, looking at my beautiful flowers, and enjoying this fine August afternoon. This past month has been a crazy one, but for once, I’m at peace with what lies ahead. Things are starting to come together. My husband’s “deployment check-list” is almost completed. Before I know it I will be saying goodbye. That day will be hard, I know. I’m sure some tears will follow, accompanied by a big bowl of feeling-sorry-for-myself ice cream and a lonely night in a big house. But for today I’m no longer fearful about what lies ahead.
What about you? Are you scared about anything? Or have you given that area of your life back to God. For me, giving fear back to God is something I do on a daily basis. Satan knows how to push buttons in my life. And one of those areas consists of fear.
What do I do then, what I start to become fearful?
I turn to God’s word.
Consider these versus. I hope one of them speaks to you personally today.
• “When I am afraid, I will trust in you” (Psalm 56:3).
• “Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The LORD, the LORD, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation” (Isaiah 12:2).
• “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6).
• ”I tell you, my friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more. But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear him who, after the killing of the body, has power to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear him. Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows” (Luke 12:4-7).
• “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).
If you’re fearful, remember that God is with you. He is ready and waiting to comfort you and help you through this rough time. But you have to reach out to him: “For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened” (Matthew 7:8).
Hello everyone,
I have to admit that I’ve been struggling these past few days. In front of my hubby I’m upbeat and helpful, but on the inside, I’ve once again let fear take hold. I didn’t want it to come back in. It came in unannounced. And once again reigns in my life.
A friend saw that I was struggling, and sent me a note, telling me that she was praying for me, and giving me a Psalm to read. What an encouragement. I cried as I read this Psalm. It expresses exactly what I’ve been feeling about this deployment.
Are you in a similar state? Are you fearing separation from your hubby today? Or maybe you’re struggling with some other issue of fear. Let these words be an encouragement to you as well:
Psalm 91:2,4-5,7-12 (NLT)
2 This I declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I trust him.
4 He will cover you with his feathers.
He will shelter you with his wings.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
5 Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
nor the arrow that flies in the day.
7 Though a thousand fall at your side,
though ten thousand are dying around you,
these evils will not touch you.
8 Just open your eyes,
and see how the wicked are punished.
9 If you make the Lord your refuge,
if you make the Most High your shelter,
10 no evil will conquer you;
no plague will come near your home.
11 For he will order his angels
to protect you wherever you go.
12 They will hold you up with their hands
so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.
In this Psalm, I was reminded that God alone is my refuge and strength. He is my “place of safety” when the whole world feels out of whack. He really will keep me safe when I’m alone in a big house at night. He will hold me in his arms as I fall asleep without my hubby by my side. He will watch over me each day as I run errands and live my every moment for him. This Psalm also brings great promises for my husband, who will be serving his country over seas. God promises to protect and keep him safe, so that one day, when his deployment is through, he can come back to me. These promises are what I have to cling to when I begin to doubt, begin to fear the unknown. I hope they were an encouragement for all of you as well.
For more encouragement see www.incourage.me.
In my devotions this morning, I was reading the last two chapters of the book of Job. One verse in particular stuck out to me. Job 41:11 says, “Who has given me anything that I need to pay back? Everything under heaven is mine” (Job 41:11 NLT). In this verse, God is reminding Job that He really doesn’t have to give him anything. The Lord knows what we should and shouldn’t have. He doesn’t have to “repay” us for any of the good things we did on the earth. He deserved our praise and adoration no matter what we have or do not have.
In Job, we read about a man who was blessed abundantly. Then, one day God allowed all of that to be taken away. Why? Because he wanted to see how Job would react to the situation. Although Job grieved, he did stay true to the Lord, praising him even in the hard times. And so, God blessed him in the end even more abundantly than before.
With the deployment looming up ahead, it’s easy for me to feel bad for myself. I can start wallowing in the fact that I’ll be lonely and I won’t have fun. I can even be mad at God for allowing this to happen.
But that isn’t what God is asking from me today.
Today, he is asking me to worship him in every circumstance. Yes, this next season will be a tough one, but He wants my adoration even then.
I’m reminded of a song by Tree63 called, “Blessed Be Your Name.” In this song, there’s a refrain that goes, “You give and take away/You give and take away/ My heart will choose to say/ Lord, Blessed be your name.”
May this always be my attitude, in the good times and the bad.
When I heard my husband was going to be deployed, one of the things I struggled with the most was finding peace about the situation. I was worried about my husband’s safety while he was over seas. I was worried about living in a house by myself. I was worried about taking care of the household finances. I was worried about traveling to visit family on my own. I was worried about going to the store, at night without my personal bodyguard (aka husband) by my side. I was anxious about all of these things. Any sense of peace was far from me. In essence, I was a mess. I really needed to ask the Lord for help.
Luke 11:10 says,
“For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened” (NIV).
God was ready and waiting to give me peace, when I asked for it.
That peace made such a difference in how I looked at the impending deployment. Yes, I still had times when I worried, but beneath it all, I felt God’s comfort through it all.
Here are a few verses on peace that I hold close to my heart. Hopefully they’ll be a blessing to you as well:
• “The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace” (Psalm 29:11 NIV).
• You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you” (Isaiah 26:3 NIV).
• “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7 NIV).
When your husband deploys, it feels as if part of your heart deploys along with him. After I heard the news that my husband would be leaving me and going overseas, I was in shock. I couldn’t concentrate on any one thing. I would go from one thing to the next, never really finishing the project in hand. I listened to music, cried, and thought in detail about how lonely this next chapter of married life would be without my husband by my side. I would be living in a town where I hardly knew anyone, with only my cat to keep me company at night. The time we had left before he left would be so scarce. I dwelt on the holidays and memories he would miss while he was away. I felt hurt, alone, and despondent.
After a few days of sadness, I had a decision to make. Would I wallow in grief and loneliness, or would I live my life to the fullest?
I began to realize that my life really wasn’t over. My husband still loved me, and needed me to be his encourager and manager of the household while he was away.
I still had a great purpose.
Looking toward the deployment, I honestly still didn’t know what it would be like, but just the same, I had hope. Hope that God would be my strength and help me through it. Hope that he would guard me each night and keep me safe as I slept all alone. Hope that my marriage would grow from this separation and come out stronger on the other end.
I knew that there was no way I would make it through this next lonely chapter on my own. I needed my Lord and Savior to be my rock. As one of my favorite Psalms begins, “God is our refuge and strength, and ever-present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1). Isn’t that a wonderful promise? That he will be our strength when we have none on our own. That was certainly the place I was at, as I looked toward a lonely deployment.
And that is why I want to encourage you through your owns struggles, whether they be a deployment, a family hardship, or just the stresses of life in general. Cling to God, my friends, and he will see you through the tough days ahead. As Psalm 62:6 says, “He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.”
Welcome to Devotions for the Deployed Heart!
My hope is that this site will serve as a great encouragement to military wives all over the world. As a military wife myself, I understand the ups and downs this way of life can bring. It’s exciting living around the world with your family, but it can also be tremendously lonely. Be encouraged and know you’re not alone!
